2024 NFL (week 1)

Chiefs-27 Ravens-20

It’s foooooooooooooootball time-Bonecrusher voice, obviously we love college football over here but that first Thursday of the NFL is always fun.

One time I tried getting home quickly to watch the opener (2019 opener) and a cop pulled me over for speeding (which I wasn’t and I told him and got no ticket).

I predicted the Ravens would win 28–24 and that did not happen as they were defeated 27–20 at Kansas City but what a game.

In my opinion both teams shined and had moments of lackluster play but it’s week one and we don’t have as much preseason anymore.

The Ravens found a new toy in Derrick Henry to play with this season and though he did reach the endzone, he seemed a tad slower to me on the field.

Henry on the day totaled 13 carries for 46 yards and one touchdown which feels pedestrian but it is a long season and giving Henry 20+ carries in September feels dumb.

Packers-29 Eagles -34

I hope Jordan Love is ok. Saquon Barkley paid homage to Ronaldo with a hattrick in Brazil. If you were high or low on the Eagles as a whole I feel like you were proven right on Friday.

AJ Brown and Devonta Smith combined for 203 yards while Saquon carried the ball 24 times for 109.

I liked the Eagles passing game but Hurts running 13 times for 33 yards is concerning both for the quanitity and quality of the runs. My biggest criticism with the Eagles and Bills is how much they run their QBS especially up the middle.

It is only week one, but Hurts rushing yards per carry dropped for the fourth consecutive year from 5.6 to 4.6 to 3.9 to 2.5.

Last season felt like Hurts scrambled outside the pocket into no-man’s land very frequently so we will see if he can correct that this year.

For a team without a top receiver, Jayden Reed sure played like one.

Reed caught 64 passes for 789 yards last season along with 11 carries for 119 yards and 10 total touchdowns. Comparing Reed to a Ceedee Lamb or Deebo Samuel might be lofty but why can’t Reed have a similar impact?

In Reed’s last nine regular season games he has amassed 45 catches for 598 yards and six touchdowns along with 10 carries for 133 yards and three touchdowns. Over a 17-game season that adds up to 85–1130–11 and 19–256–6 respectively. While it is unlikely those rushing touchdowns hold up, the opportunity for him to evolve into a top tier gamechanger is right there.

Steelers-18 Falcons-10

I watched the first quarter of this game and I cannot tell you what happened. Justin Fields did not look great but he got the W for the black and gold. I saw Fields play once in the 2019 Fiesta Bowl and I felt like he had issues processing the game speed at times and I feel like that criticism still holds up. I would not be surprised if every Steelers game had a 19–16-like score because they can probably only win rockfights which Steelers fans will enjoy.

The Falcons should have never paid Kirk Cousins. I don’t even know what time Atlanta is on but Cousins does not fit that timeline.

Kirk just wanted to throw for 280 meaningless yards every game, go 8–9 and get his boring midwestern family acclimated to the Dirty South. Now he has to look over his shoulder for Michael Penix jr and all the chicken wings are way too spicy for Kirky C. Kirk just wanted to spend his money at some fancy Buckhead establishment and now he has to EARN his money?

Life is not fair.

Bills-34 Cardinals-28

Marvin Harrison jr got three targets on Sunday. You could trot out Marvin Harrison sr and we’re getting him at least 8 because I know he can get open against the zone still. Kyler’s career feels like a blur to me at this point because he was so exciting and beloved his first two seasons then after that Rams debacle it seems like every hates him and wishes he was taller. Josh Allen had a good performance and it will be interesting to see how their offense operates without Stefon Diggs.

If I had to nitpick Buffalo’s performance, James Cook only had 71 yards on 19 carries for a 3.7 average. I don’t know if you know, but Buffalo gets cold so they will need that running game from non-Josh Allen Bills to keep him fresh for a long playoff run. Allen did run for two touchdowns on nine carries but I would prefer Allen ran five or six times a game.

I really like Coleman as a 6'4 possession receiver for the strong-armed Allen plus Kincaid will likely take a step forward as well. Five different WRs and two TEs caught at least one pass so the depth of Buffalo’s receivers should not be questioned but we will see how dependable they are against a Kansas City or Baltimore.

Titans-17 Bears-24

As much as I like laughing at the Bears QB situation I really hope they get it right this team. The Bears spent a 1st on Cade McNown in 1999, Rex Grossman in 2003, Mitch Trubisky in 2017, Justin Fields in 2021 and traded two firsts for Jay Cutler. Chicago has tried finding the franchise quarterback only for each of those qbs to disapoint to some degree.

Caleb Williams was supposed to walk on water on Sunday but he had a so-so performance. In this 24/7 news cycle we live in, patience has been thrown out the window so we expect 300 yards from Williams right now. Bears fans on twitter were projecting as much as 5,000 yards for Caleb Williams which sounds good in theory but is very hard to obtain. You think NFL defenders around the league aren’t ready to humble this kid who paints his nails? Who does that guy think he is?

Patriots-16 Bengals-10

This game had 287 total passing yards so thankfully I do not live in the part of the country showing this game. The Bengals would have performed better if Joe Burrow was not blond in my opinion. Congrats to Jerod Mayo on his first one but that game seemed like November Big 10 football. If Purdue and Michigan State were on the screen it all would have made sense.

Texans-29 Colts-27

Anthony Richardson made a crazy throw but that was not enough to beat the Texans. Richardson had three total touchdowns but only went 9–19 from the field. I hate comparing Richardson to Cam Newton because Cam won MVP but we might have to grade Richardson on the Cam Newton scale. Cam completed 59.8% of his passes in the NFL while Richardson is currently sitting at 57. Both Richardson and Newton average 38 rushing yards per game while Newton’s 218 passing yards easily surpasses Richardson’s 158. After Taylor rushed for 1,800 yards he has struggled to regain that form.

Dolphins-20 Jags-17

Tyreek Hill getting arrested then accumulating 130 yards feels like something straight out of Ballers. I had never felt more confident in a Hill touchdown than I did last Sunday and he delivered. Who knows how good the Jags will be but I wonder how warm Doug Pederson’s seat is.

Broncos-20 Seahawks-26

Bo Nix had a less than stellar game and while I don’t dislike the Broncos it is fun to cheer against Sean Payton. If Nix does not pan out, Payton might start getting Drew Brees-merchant whispers and I am sure he would not like that.

Chargers-22 Raiders-10

Folks love Antonio Pierce for being a players coach but I wonder when the goodwill pays off. Never forget, Pierce was there when Plaxico Burress shot himself so maybe Pierce is not the best person in regards to guidance. I love how racially ambigious Pierce is especially as a California man. Random but, Pierce’s wife is just named “Jocelyn” on wiki and Google I love it.

I was in on Minshew mania until he buddied up to Trump so now I am upset he is on the Raiders. The Raiders used to mean something dammit. The Raiders were about rebellion not bootlicking former presidents who don’t care about minorities.

Herbert threw only 26 pass attempts which is on brand for Jim Harbaugh as Kaepernick never averaged over 30 attempts per game while being coached by Harbaugh.

Saints-47 Panthers-10

I would have traded Brian Burns for those two first round picks. Not sure if I would’ve hit both but I like my chances on hitting one of those firsts. The Panthers had Derek Carr looking like 2010-Brees so maybe this season is already over as well.

Cowboys-33 Browns-17

Deshaun Watson sucks plain and simple. The Cowboys offense was solid yet unspectacular like week one of 2023 when they defeated the Giants 40–0. Dak and Ceedee had decent games but they did not have to play aggressive during the game.

Part of me wonders if Ceedee Lamb plays a bigger role in the running game and receives three or four carries a game.

Bucs-37 Commanders-20

Washington may have found their QB of the future but he cannot slide and their field is still trash.

Tampa looks like a double-digit win team as long as Baker keeps it up and the remains from their title team continue contributing.

Lions-26 Rams-20

The Lions Super Bowl run to 2025 started with a bang as they defeated old pal Matthew Stafford and the Rams.

A big story for the Rams is they will be a force if they can stay healthy but it feels like we said that last year.

Niners-32 Jets-19

At least Aaron Rodgers did not die on the field. Rodgers looked decent Sunday but it appears Rodgers doesn’t like the right (pun intended).

The Niners were missing Christian McCaffrey but baby Shanahan and the Niners offense keeps on chugging. HB Jordan Mason is the newest member in a long line of unknown runningbacks to excel under the Shanahan zone-blocking scheme. Maybe with Mason receiving more touches, CMC can have a greater impact in a passing game that already has Deebo Samuel, Brandon Aiyuk, George Kittle and newcomers Ricky Pearsall and Jacob Cowing.

The Niners offense was efficient yet unspectacular yet it did not need to be Monday. They just needed to control the ball and make low-risk gains.

Vikings-28 Giants-6

I know the MNF was the last of the week but I had to dedicate some time to laugh at the New York Giants. Credit to the Vikings for showing out with a backup quarterback in Sam Darnold, but unless the Giants bench Jones, their season is over. Daniel Jones just is not a big enough threat in the passing game and it is a disservice to everyone in the Giants organization by investing so much in him. The Giants in my opinion should have paid Saquon, let Jones walk and draft a QB that year like maybe Will Levis. Levis obviously isn’t great but he is as good as Jones while being much cheaper.

Ever since Eli Manning threw 27 ints in 2013 this franchise feels unserious. The Giants benched Eli for being trash in 2017 and the anti-snowflake brigade was up in arms for them hurting Eli’s wee little feelings. I wonder who the Giants will pick for their new QB but we all know it is not Shedeur Sanders.